Soap on the floor.

For instance: my conversation with Biggest this morning.

Me: Do you like crackers?
B: Um…. I like food!

Also, I’m not sure if this counted as funny or horrifying, but I had all the childproofing stuff up, and laid down on the floor for a few minutes with Biggest climbing over me (side note, little knees are sharp, and I finally figured out where all my leg bruises come from), annnnd woke up 45 minutes later. To the sound of running water. After orienting myself, and having an absolute heart attack, I found him standing ever so happily on his stool (I didn’t hear it at all because apparently since yesterday he’s suddenly tall enough to carry it instead of drag it. I’d also like to mention that it’s a 2 step stool and awkward even for me to carry). He was, get this, washing his hands and brushing his teeth. True story. I now find myself thankful that I stuck to my guns and did not listen to the public health nurse insisting that I brush his teeth with fluoride toothpaste, even though he’s too little to spit, and it says clearly on the back “do not swallow”. So, disaster side stepped, toothpaste tube completely empty and all over the counter, one soaked Biggest, and Kandoo brand green foaming soap on the bathroom floor. I now vow to myself that if I ever decide to lay down on the floor, it will be with all the stuff in the bathroom at the tip top of a very tall cupboard, and the stool in a place he can’t get to. I’m also considering gating off the bathroom and putting his little potty outside the door instead. Or, and I think this is my best option, I upgrade from one cup of coffee in the morning to flat out espresso. Or toothpicks for my eyeballs. As of tonight, regardless, I’m going to bed at 10, period. I’m hoping that if I go to bed early and get enough sleep, I will only have to deal with groggy instead of tired and groggy.

In Littlest news, he can now roll over both ways, and said his first syllable today. Drumroll please! Yaaaaaaaaaa. That was the funniest sound coming from a 2 foot creature.

I’ll update you on how the bedtime goes, that was a year off my life I’ll never get back. (I do however, feel slightly less horrified after reading a story a couple of years ago on a website that escapes me about a lady who’s kid got onto the kitchen counter while she was still in bed, in the middle of the night. We gate the hallway off so Biggest can only get to our room).

Anyway, I’m off to finish my mint tea, fresh from the garden, and play my free poker tournament. I hope your day was a lot smoother and less terrifying than mine was.


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