Breaking News

We have an ear! One has been returned safely. The other is still missing, and the kidnapper is still at large.

Evidence collected yesterday finished processing around 2:00pm, and was returned safely to it’s owner. Current reports indicate the ear may be prisoner in the Fridge area, and other results show that the kidnapper may have close ties with Blood Sugar, a known person of interest. Further processing also indicated a link to Dewie Mi-Self, and Noe. All forces have been diverted from other tasks to track down any additional leads, and recover the other ear. Several more pieces of evidence have been taken in for processing, although the volume is not as significant as yesterday.

While retrieving the other ear is of utmost importance, and bringing the kidnapper to justice is also a top priority, rehabilitation for the victim is now underway. Biggest is under close watch for any negative effects due to his loss, and will be treated accordingly. Prognosis is good, and condition is improving with additional snacks, and plenty of one-on-one playtime. It should also be noted that the recovered ear seems to be in unbelievably excellent condition.

*No ears or Biggests were harmed in bringing you this report.
ย *Additional reports available here.


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