Awkward Developmental Milestones Anyone?


I’d like to start by saying that I have no idea what 2 1/2 year olds are supposed to be capable of. I stopped reading developmental milestones when he was 6 months and not sitting up yet. Having given up the weekly emails, big thick books, and various other paraphernalia targetted specifically to people like me, I discovered that pretty much every kid has their own pace (be it snail or hare) and will get to those milestones eventually.

However, I realized yesterday that while the following may not be regular milestones, they still sent me for an extremely awkward that’s-not-supposed-to-start-yet loop.

1) It’s Behind The Closet Door So It’s Clean. Biggest was supposed to be cleaning up yesterday, with the promise of playing with me when he was done. After assuring me that all his toys were put away, I went to inspect, and opened the closet door to an extremely large collection of stuffed animals, blankets, and trucks. After suppressing (just barely) a laugh, I turned to him and told him that closing the closet door on his toys does not make them clean. His response? “Oh.”

2) I Have To Pee! Can you guess which one this relates to? Yep, stalling. He’s also incredibly clever at it. Oh he still uses the go-to’s, such as “I have to pee!” every 5 minutes, but he has also discovered other methods. These include cleaning up “extra” thoroughly (ie: taking all the blocks down to their individual level before going in the bucket), washing his hands longer because the bubbles “aren’t gone yet”, and my favorite, “I have to poop!”. Poop is one thing I find hard to ignore, because despite him being completely potty trained for over 4 months, it is still an automatic reaction to get him on the toilet just in case… and he knows it! The best part though? “Oh, poop all gone.” right after he sat down.

3) The Cute Factor. This one kills me every time! He’ll ask something really sweetly, and not only am I taken off guard by the lack of tantrum involved, but it’s a double whammy because he knows how happy I am when he uses please or thank you. Top that off with an innocent “That good idea?” and (if it weren’t for my superior willpower) I would be a puddle on the floor.

4) Privacy. Since Biggest has been potty trained for a while, we’ve started introducing privacy. (Also, I was getting a little weirded out by the number of questions he had when hubby or I were finished in the shower…) The other day, he locked himself in the bathroom so he could poop (thank heavens he follows directions well!). The day after that, I walked in on him sitting on his potty, and he gave me the most offended look I’ve ever seen, and said “Hey! Go!”… Awkward…

5) Letters and Numbers. Now, admittedly, he’s probably a little behind in this one, as most kids I’ve met seem to be able to recite them even if they don’t completely understand the concept. However, thanks to the lack of television in our house, he’s discovered them on his own, and with surprising accuracy. It does, however, make it a little difficult to read or type because with a book, he keeps trying to flip the page to get to the next page number, and when I’m typing, he keeps trying to get me to push a different letter. The only thing he refuses to correct? Counting to 3. No matter how many times you tell him how it’s supposed to be, he’ll still recite it as “One, two, eight, seben, free!”. Apparently I was stubborn about that when I was a kid, so I guess he gets it from me.

Silly boy.

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