Stay-At-Home Misconceptions. Ha!

I have a confession to make. I am a busy person. I know, it’s shocking. Really. In all seriousness, being a stay-at-home mom is busy. At some point along the way though, be it from the internet, or other people’s assumptions, staying at home has not only lost its appeal, but it has also lost its integrity. Staying at home is now considered, dare I say it, a cop-out. It’s utterly ridiculous. I have stumbled onto a few common misconceptions that I thought I’d shed some light on.

You get to stay in pajamas all day.
This one’s laughable. I may still be in pajamas, but that’s only because if I dare start the water for the shower, I am guaranteed to be serenaded in various octaves of “scream”. If you actually think about this one for a second, who in their right mind would want to meet the guy from Fedex in maternity pants and a tank top that still smells funny because you forgot to hang the laundry properly?

You must be bored stiff.
Just what do you think I’m doing? I’d like to be bored, I truly would. But sadly, my days are spent wishing for 15 minutes of peace and quiet. What am I actually doing, you ask? Well, to be honest, I’m not really sure. I forgot somewhere between wiping Biggest’s bum and being screamed at for more cereal from Littlest. If I remember correctly, I usually spend time vacuuming up cheerios, hunting for missing critters, wiping up spilled milk, trying to figure out what’s for dinner, and rescuing Littlest from the Xbox. When I’m not doing that, I’m trying to keep up with the housework. Folding laundry, cleaning bathrooms, and washing dishes are all part of the days work, provided the tantrums, milk, and rescuings aren’t constant. Bored? I think not.

You’re free to do whatever you’d like.
If the above statement was not enough to assure you, let me say it again. No. Not even close. Admittedly, I am capable of scheduling play dates and outings, but not only do I have to plan around the kiddos (unless I want mega-meltdowns in the middle of downtown), usually by the time they get here, I just want to take a nap. When I’m actually home, I’ve long since given up the idea that games and/or books are available for any attention that lasts more than 15 minutes. If it’s not the aforementioned spilled milk, water fetching, or diaper changing, it’s the inevitable “what are you doing Mommy” question, followed by the even more inevitable “hovering”. I have, much to my excitement, carved out 35 minutes for coffee, but only on the promise that if I am left alone the entire 35 minutes, I will be dispensing zhombie time. It’s a powerful compromise.

I’m sure there’s more that I’ve missed, but at this point, I’m wasting valuable coffee time, and I’ve recently decided to write a book. I’m optimistic about it, although I’m unsure as to whether it will go anywhere big. Also, coffee needs, well, coffee, and mine’s still sitting in the pot. Off I go!

The Handler.


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