Eau Du Monday

Welcome to another week. Today’s turning out to be one of those days I like to categorize as being filled with Eau Du Monday. Eau Du Monday is an exotic scent, characterized by Blah and a complex mix of Sass, Whine, Fitful Sleep, Unknown Soreness, along with the unmistakable fragrances of Hubby-Went-To-School and Oil of Early Rising. Yet amongst the strong front, it allows for a subtle finish of Errands and Wish-For-A-Nap. It must be used sparingly, as it can be easily overpowering. Perfect for any occasion, it can be used for standing and staring at the floor covered in Cheerios (again), or hiding out on the computer despite best intentions. It even wears well while hauling children for disgruntled naps!

Honestly, I’m not really the Eau type, but this one seems to fit the bill. Biggest and Littlest woke up ridiculously early, Biggest had a tantrum right away because he figured banging on the door that was already cracked open instead of pulling on it would make it magically give way. I took my Wake-Up-And-Be-Happy pill too early, and sprung out of bed because I couldn’t sleep. Sprung is a loose term, I would probably consider it more of an Ugh reaction followed by reluctantly releasing the comforter in favor of the still-mostly-dark-and-very-chilly living room. I had coffee via Skype with a friend of mine, in amongst talking back, sass, and various other verbal ailments common to the Three-Year-Old age group. Eventually Biggest settled down to his quiet time, I brought Littlest out so he could have some peace and quiet, and Littlest decided that today would be the day that he’d like to be up for 5 hours straight. It may have been the excitement of being placed next to floor Cheerios, but we’ll never know for sure. Once quiet time was done, and Littlest finally fell asleep (probably full of floor Cheerios), Biggest requested Play-Doh. Which he played with for all of 4 minutes before he was announcing that Biggest was all done with Play-Doh. After various other attempts to insert his clear superiority, we come to now.

I’m tired.

I don’t know what I want for lunch.

I have housework that needs doing.

I want a nap.

I don’t get a nap, I have to go pay rent instead.

The screaming/sassing hoard needs a nap.

They don’t get a nap either.

I obviously didn’t read the label. It clearly states to go easy on the Eau, and clearly the Eau is getting the better of me. Perhaps just one whiff would have been better, in which case, I should probably go shower it off. Let’s hope that it comes off, I seem to recall this particular Eau clinging to you for dear life.

The Handler.


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