Rebels Among Us


Well… it has recently come to my attention that Littlest has been conspiring against me. And I have evidence to prove it. Of course, this has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he’s three. Nothing at all. Really. Ok, I guess it could have something to do with it, but it feels more like conspiring, so I’m going to go with that.

For all intents and purposes, Littlest has completely ignored the general house regulations. He signed them when he was born, but it appears he’s not a fan of reading fine print. I mean, the first thing on the list is: Breathe Air. Under that, in the fine print, is share the air with other household members, and try to do so in a peaceful manner. Alas. No such luck.

Littlest claimed bathroom was necessary, and in the time he normally takes to pee, he also managed to abscond with an entire package of Jolly Ranchers, a Werther’s, and the toothpaste. I can’t imagine how fast he must have peed. Either way, he ate them all and filled the wrappers with toothpaste before anyone noticed.

In another instance, due to my sister visiting, he was napping on my bed instead of his own. During this time, he pulled out all of our cards, including UNO, SKIP-BO, and Pokemon… in less than 10 minutes. Another nap caught him in my underwear drawer. And still another nap had him chewing my gum. To clarify, I had no idea that I still owned gum. I have no idea where he found it, and it was again in less than 10 minutes. You see, I got really smart after the underwear drawer, which was the first incident. I tried to circumvent by checking on his napping progress every 5/10 minutes until he was asleep. Unfortunately, he just got wise, and waited until I left to go exploring. Thank heavens I don’t keep anything crazy within arms reach.

In a whole host of other examples, I have been deliberately antagonised by this lovable little rebel. Tongue out, staring at me while doing exactly the opposite of what I’d told him to do… the list really does go on. Sure is a little firecracker… He’s going to keep me on my toes! (I mean, he does that already, but shit just got REAL.)

 

And with that, I’m off to bed, so I can have some time to collect myself before seeing what he can get up to tomorrow.

The Handler.

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